"The wound is the place where the Light enters you." – Rumi
Inside all of us lies this inner space of possibility, an inner source of light. When times get tough, we have two options: find the source of light, or wallow in the darkness.
How will you find it, you may ask? Well, you may not like my answer. You must fail. You must hurt. ?You must endure betrayal, or cause some kind of harm to yourself or another, either knowingly or unknowingly.
Yes, you heard that right. So, if you’re reading this right now, you're on the right path.
The irony in becoming strong is that you must be unafraid to know what it is to be weak. You must be unafraid to learn about your boundaries, where you need to let go, and where you may need to take a leap of faith. In this awareness, you'll learn the most important thing about yourself—you will survive and you will prosper.
I remember the day I had to pack my bags and say goodbye. I was with my then fiancé for four years, and we were in the middle of house shopping. All seemed perfect, as he had just received a promotion at work. We planned a beautiful celebration for him with all of our closest friends and family.
The morning after the celebration, I came home from the gym while he was at work, and I received a Facebook private message. A random woman sent me a message to notify me my fiancé went out on a date with her friend.
I was just about to give my fiancé a nice promotion gift, filled with money, when the anger built inside me and tears couldn't even roll down my eyes. This "other" woman found out about all my secrets, all my childhood trauma—things that my boyfriend used as his excuse to cheat on me. Needless to say, I was, again, betrayed.
See, the beautiful thing about these moments is that, in all the pain, we find our strength. As hurt as I was, I knew deep down inside there was only one thing to do—leave. It took many months of confusion and angst. I tried to let our life go back to normal, but it just would not. I tried to repair and forgive, but it was over.
I packed my bags and never looked back. That seemed like one of the darkest times of my life, but it was the proverbial blessing in disguise. I would soon come into so much light, that I would choose to experience it over and over again.
When in the dark, try these four things to find your light and come into your strength:
- I promise, you will not be alone. Sit in solitude and let your voice be heard. Ask for the courage and the strength to keep moving forward. Something, or someone, will answer your prayers. Don't give up faith. There is a power far greater than you. Whatever your beliefs about God or religion, be open to the idea of a higher consciousness. All the answers you seek are already within you. Harness this power, and believe everything will eventually be okay.
- Recite this mantra: "I was put here for a reason and it was to do great things." Even if you don't believe it now, you will—as long as you keep saying it to yourself. Remain focused on this mantra. Your circumstances do not dictate who you are; you are ever-evolving, and this is just a passing moment in the continuum of your life.
- Enough said. Five minutes, 30 minutes, an hour. You already know the drill—just move! You will feel enormously powerful.
- Be part of something greater than yourself. Find a cause. Wake up and take action for something that sets your soul on fire. In the action of service, we slowly remove ourselves from our own wants and desires, and find strength in becoming part of something greater. The ones you help may have something to teach you.
Our toughest times are the breeding ground for our strongest. Be thankful for every experience that breaks you down.
The day I left my old life, I began a new life. Since then, I have trained and completed five marathons, changed careers, become a yoga teacher, and met amazing people through volunteering. I've learned to let bad people go and good people in. I’ve learned to welcome the journey and be thankful for all the lessons. Needless to say, I never looked back; and if I did, it was only to see how far I had come.
Take a walk on the wild side and taste the rain. We were born to die, but for now, you are alive.