Abusive marriages

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Articles Emotional abuse General discussion Physical abuse Verbal abuse

Scared66061

5 months ago

Unprepared
We had my husbands kids this past weekend and after we dropped them off to their mom we were at a stop light and he said he was moving out. No warning. Yes I know their was various forms of abuse but I don’t think he realized he was doing it. I miss him and do not know how to live now

MSSgear

about 1 year ago

Contentious divorce

We have two small children and he will not move out or sell house. I do not know what my options are.

DivorceForce

about 1 year ago

Tsh 082316 the face of abuse e1539635475124

The Face of Abuse (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
Just as you can’t always look at a woman and tell she’s being abused, you can’t always look at a man and tell he’s abusive. Looks can be deceiving. Abusers are excellent at deceiving. They don’t look the part and seldom do they act the part outside of the home. Most people who knew my ex... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 1 year ago

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How One Woman Paved Her Own Way and Left An Abusive Marriage (by: Dr. Kristin Davin)
I have worked with numerous victims of abuse. It’s amazing how abuse – in any form – sneaks up on you. It’s only when you find yourself and your life spinning out of control and has become something you never thought would happen, do you even begin to have any clarity pave a path. How your lens... Continue reading

Murvoen

over 1 year ago

New and seeking advice

I just found this community, and I'm looking for all the resources I can to help plan my exit strategy from my marriage. I've been married three years, but the night before last I finally realized how done I am with the end result of every argument being that it's my fault and I need to do better... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Victim Blaming And The Lies They Tell You (by: Janet Rhodes)
The first time my ex was arrested for assaulting me was July 2009. He was actually arrested for assaulting myself and our toddler son. Like so many other abusive relationships the abuse had been escalating prior to his arrest. He was relentless at screaming at me, at abusing our young son and... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Divorcing a Narcissist: Next to Impossible, But Completely Necessary (by: Victoria McCooey)
Is it just me, or does it seem that there’s an epidemic of narcissism in the world today? Or maybe we just know what to call these people now. Or maybe the victims are just speaking out more. Or maybe it’s because I deal every day with women who are in difficult divorces. Whatever the reason,... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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25 Signs of Emotional Abuse (by: Sinta Ebersohn)
Sometimes, emotional abuse can be so subtle that we don’t even realise we’re being emotionally and mentally abused by someone’s words or actions. Even though there are no visible bruises, the damage should never be underestimated. How can it be abuse if it is so subtle? This kind of conduct... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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How an Abusive Marriage Hurts Children
Regardless of whether a parent hits them, too, children are injured by domestic violence. Kids are the silent victims. They’re traumatized when they witness one parent attacking the other, and they can also feel threatened or be hurt themselves. If you’re in an abusive marriage, the best thing... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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What To Know When You Get Out Of An Abusive Relationship (by: Nicola Beer)
Until I worked in the field of helping men and women heal their childhood wounds or from abusive relationships I didn’t comprehend the scale of emotional abuse taking place today. Emotional abuse happens across all cultures regardless of religious, economic and social background and it is a... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

Nina palmer e1531759571978

Spotlight: Nina C. Palmer – Poet, Writer, Divorcee, Abuse Survivor, Inspiration
The greatest value of being “DivorceForce” is that we get to connect with amazing, inspirational people. One such person is Nina Palmer. We found Nina to have an ugly past. But Nina faced off against her past in her own emotional reflection. She confronted her emotions and rebounded. We see her... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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My Journey through Domestic Violence (by: Janet Rhodes)
Life is a journey. We are born small and helpless and grow up to adults. Along the way, we learn to walk and then run. We have pitfalls and victories. All are a part of our journey through life and each experience shapes us into the person we are today. My journey started like many others. I was... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Men and the Domestic Violence Restraining Order (by: Kennedy Bell)
Men, here is some practical guidance to follow when educating yourself about domestic abuse. Most of the laws relevant to domestic violence and sexual assault are based on state law. This includes restraining or protection orders, divorce, custody, crimes, and more. There are also federal laws... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Was The Love Ever Real with Your Narcissist? (by: Lindsey Ellison)
I remember the day as if it were yesterday. My N boyfriend and I went to church together, then had a wonderful brunch, we made passionate love, and then he left for the week to be with his children in another state. Despite this wonderful day together, something deeply bothered me. I tried... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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5 Signs You Are in an Abusive Marriage (by: Dr. Anne Brown PhD, RN)
Abusive marriages come in different forms. Most people are quick to think of “physical abuse” but there are definitely other acts of abuse that detriment the wellbeing of individuals at the hands of their domestic partner. 1. Physical Abuse In theory, in this country, no one can touch you... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Know What Relationship Gaslighting Is and How to Recover From It (by: Lisa Arends)
In all of my divorce, the single most painful event was an email, sent to both my mother and to his other wife a mere day after he was arrested for bigamy. In the message, he created and twisted stories that painted me as controlling, greedy and impossible to live with. This was followed by a... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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14 Ways to Recognize Emotional Abuse (by: Dr. Kristin Davin)
Emotional abuse. It’s insidious how it creeps into your life. It’s one of those things that, at first glance, may feel innocuous. The small slights and put-downs don’t feel to be that significant – at first – because they occur sporadically and are often “peppered” with random acts of kindness,... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Is Your Spouse a Psychopath? Dos and Don’ts When Divorcing (by: Lisa Brick)
There are numerous reasons a relationship unravels. The majority of them are due to a growing incompatibility of values and lifestyle choices. In some cases, the reason is considerably deeper and darker. While these reasons are the exceptions rather than the rule, they are often if not always the... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Proving Spousal Abuse in Court
Domestic abuse touches as many as 4 million people a year, including its effects on other family members, according to the Rosen Law Firm in North Carolina. About two-thirds of all marriages experience at least one abusive incident. Obtaining relief in the family court system depends on whether... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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Say No to Abusive Relationships Forever! (by Dr. Anne Brown PhD, RN)
Unfortunately, when you grow up with emotional or physical abuse your body can wire love and abuse together and it think’s that is normal. Some people who grew up with abuse have the ability and resilience to say NEVER again. Often we find if there was one person who provided unconditional love... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 1 year ago

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6 Ways to Spot a Narcissistic Mother (by: Naja Hall)
In our community, I notice that a lot of us are overly emotional but we lack the depth to properly express our feelings. People increasingly seem more angry and confused. There are so many walking around with undiagnosed mental illnesses and the majority of our issues began taking root during our... Continue reading

AmbieC

almost 2 years ago

Ambie C
How do I get my heart and my brain to agree? It's over after 3 years of physical and emotional abuse it's done. OVER!!! Been so sad???

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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How to Get Back Into a Relationship After an Abusive Marriage
When your marriage ends, you need time to adjust to being single again. The longer the marriage lasted, the longer it might take for you to become accustomed to your new role and to explore issues that caused your marriage to end. If your newly-ended marriage was abusive, it’s critical that you... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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Dear Woman: (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
I see you jump when you hear that key in the door. You can’t possibly know who’s going to walk through that door. It’s usually one of three people: the mad one, the happy one, or the indifferent one. Whichever one it is, you’ve been in the game long enough to know that whichever one you first... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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Who Do You Think I Am?? – A Question to Your Abuser (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
I often questioned my ex-husband whenever he was up to his shenanigans and foolishness. I wondered just who he thought he was to mistreat me so blatantly and so often. For every time I forgave him, it wouldn’t be long before he was off doing some other stupid thing. Finally, one day, I asked the... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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Spotlight: His Ex-Wife is a Narcissist
“Frog Bard” has been an active member on DivorceForce. So DivorceForce reached out to him to learn more about his challenges and triumphs. He tells a story of his narcissist ex-wife. Often when the term “narcissist” is used, many people immediately think of a “guy.” So we wanted to speak with... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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Domestic Abuse/Violence: Economic Grip (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
Many people are of the belief that domestic abuse is limited to physical beatings. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Domestic abuse/violence can be physical, mental/emotional, and economic. Notice that I didn’t use the “and/or” option because if one type of abuse is present, the likelihood... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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Domestic Abuse – It Happens to Guys Too (by: Audrey Cade)
Be honest. When you watch a news report about an incident of domestic violence, whose mugshot do you expect to appear? The majority of us most likely expect to see a male perpetrator led to a police cruiser in handcuffs or wearing an orange jumpsuit for arraignment before a judge. We, as a... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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5 Reasons (and Zero Excuses) Why Abuse Occurs In Marriage (by: Chris Armstrong)
If you were to do a heavy exploration into confidence and self-worth, you would find that we get our self-worth from one of four things. You would also find that most people who profess their confidence are not actually confident. Simply put, the mere fact that they feel the need to profess it is... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 2 years ago

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Domestic Violence: Are You Physically Abused? How to Get Out Safely (by: Deborah Moskovitch)
Domestic Violence must be stopped. Leaving an abusive relationship is hard. What may sound simple to an outsider is more complex to those on the inside. It’s not as simple as it sounds. Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women – more than car accidents, muggings and rapes... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 2 years ago

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5 Key Gender Differences In Narcissists (by: Lisa Thomson)
Have you ever wondered if there are gender differences in narcissists? Well, I wondered that very thing recently so I did a little research. Turns out, narcissists are more alike than different regardless of gender. That said there are a few specific differences in the behaviors of narcissistic... Continue reading

Suzy4666

about 2 years ago

Total trainwreck
Recently divorced as of 12-15-17 and for the life of me i just can't get him out of my mind and heart..

DivorceForce

about 2 years ago

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The Abusive Marriage – What Happened to Me? (by: Dr. Anne Brown RNCS)
In order to heal from an abusive marriage, it is important to understand what happened. The following are some scenarios and tactics of the perpetrator used to keep you under his/her thumb. See if you can identify any you recognize and let’s see if we can unravel this abusive puzzle. The first... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 2 years ago

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Steps in Leaving an Emotionally Abusive Marriage
Abuse is still abuse when it involves words rather than physical violence. The U.S. Office on Women’s Health categorizes emotional abuse as attempts to control someone through fear or isolation and says that it can lead to physical abuse. If your marriage has gone down this path, you can take... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 2 years ago

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20 Behaviors to Know if You Are Involved With A Narcissist (by: Christine Marie)
Is it me, or does it seem like there are more and more narcissists in the world than ever before? Maybe it’s because we are breeding a generation of them with the hordes of reality shows today. Kanye and Kim quickly come to mind, but they are not alone in the narcissist kingdom. Narcissists (N’s)... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 2 years ago

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Handling A Bullying Partner During Your Divorce (by: Ann Grant)
During the marriage, Mark was charismatic and charming. But when the divorce got underway, Mark became a monster. He hired the meanest bulldog of a lawyer and threatened Patricia that he would take full custody of the kids. The more Patricia tried to reason with Mark, the worse it got. And then... Continue reading

2xdivorcee

about 2 years ago

Damaged goods.
It has been a little over a year since I asked (demanded) for a divorce. I really thought I had my soul mate! Nope! Long story short he is a pedophile. He targeted my older child from my 1st marriage. To answer 3 big questions right off the bat (No I didn't know, sex I thought was great and no I... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 2 years ago

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Financial Abuse Keeps Married Victims Trapped (by: Victoria McCooey)
I recently read an article that quoted a staggering statistic: Financial abuse is present in 98% of domestic violence cases.1 While this does not mean that every case of financial abuse will turn violent, it’s still a pretty solid indicator that they go hand in hand. The article goes on to say... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Spotlight: Victoria McCooey Shares Her Abuse Story and Now Helps Others
If you are dealing with an abusive relationship you’ll want to read our interview with Victoria McCooey, which follows. Victoria shares her story and offers inspiration and advice for others. DivorceForce: Can you share your own personal experience with regards to an abusive marriage? Victoria... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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4 Different Ways Your Ex Will Keep On Abusing You, After The Papers Are Signed (by: Anonymous)
The papers are signed. The divorce is final. You’ve left your abuser so now the abuse is done, right? If you have kids with this person…no. Wrong. Very wrong. If you have no children, you can walk away from an abusive ex but when you have kids with this person, the abuse will continue to happen... Continue reading

DebbieS

over 2 years ago

Me
I am separated after a 28 year marriage! Looking to meet someone to treat me like a lady should be treated!

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Family Court, Custody And Access (by: Mad Like Crazy)
When I left Jason with my children, I fled in the night from Colorado to Ontario. I did not tell him I was leaving and in doing so, in the eyes of the law, I may have kidnapped my children. This was not something I considered when fleeing my abusive husband; I just wanted to keep my children safe... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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My Experience with Verbal Abuse from My (ex) Wife (by: Jamie Black)
I first met my spouse at my job. A friend thought that we would make a cute couple so she did her best to get us together. We even had our first date on the TLC show A Dating Story. There wasn’t a love connection right away. We saw each other off and on over the next few years. When I was doing a... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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7 Ways A Narcissist Will Treat Your Kids Badly Or Like Pawns After Divorce (by: Anonymous)
Divorced from a narcissist? My wholehearted congrats to you! Of course, if you have children with this narcissist, the bad news is you’re stuck with him or her and man, is it challenging. The narcissist thinks of him or herself first, always. Your kids’ needs will always come second, third or... Continue reading

Singledad2016

over 2 years ago

false accusations by ex wife that I molested my 3 year old daughter!
Help!!! I'm scared my wife is trying to take my kids. I've been divorced for a year my cheating ex already is remarried and was a text book NPD ( narcissistic personality disorder), she will do and say anything to hurt me, and doesn't care about my kids. I'm broke and in Colorado. I've put in for... Continue reading

darthpoppins

over 2 years ago

Healing from Emotional Abuse
I've been divorced for a little over a year. During this time I've finally allowed myself to acknowledge that I was emotionally abused by my ex wife for many years of our 26-year marriage. While I'm healthier than I've been in a long time, I'm still grieving the death of what might have been. I h... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Domestic Violence and Suicide – Get Help
Recent studies have found that domestic violence survivors have a higher than average rate of suicidal thought, with as many as 23 percent of those survivors have already attempted suicide. The DivorceForce community is here to lend YOU a helping hand! Whether you’re a domestic violence survivor... Continue reading

meghan

over 2 years ago

needing help on how to work with a toxic ex after divorce..
I need opinions/support/something....
I've been divorced for about 7 months. I have shared custody with the ex. He was abusive throughout our relationship of 14 years, but it was my only relationship so I never realized how toxic it was, until I started counseling. I have two kids, under the age ... Continue reading

FrogBard

over 2 years ago

Dr. Jekyll & Mrs. Hyde
I'm ending my 15 yr. marriage to a woman who is abusive in practically every way. (We were together 19 years)
She didn't start out that way- she was an admitted control freak, but she told me she wanted to change.

The first 13 years of our relationship were fairly good- we would argue and occasi... Continue reading

jacquelineharounian

over 2 years ago

Family counseling1

How Parental Conflict Affects Children

Since you are reading this, I am going to make a big assumption:

You are a parent (whether still married, cohabiting, separated or divorced)

I am going to further assume the following:

You occasionally expose your children to to parental conflict, and you are concerned about the harmful ... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Shame on You !!! (by: Mary Buten)
Shame vs Guilt Based on my research and the research of other shame researchers, I believe that there is a profound difference between shame and guilt. I believe that guilt is adaptive and helpful – it’s holding something we’ve done or failed to do up against our values and feeling psychological... Continue reading

babyarizona37

over 2 years ago

No
Anger, sadness, want to be who I was before all the mess of the marriage

sheltonray87

over 2 years ago

Abuse
Why isnt men dont speak up.

Charly61fl

over 2 years ago

Financial Abuse it real and hurts just as much as any other form of abuse
There is another category for abuse that isn't looked at often and not in all states is it considered abuse but it definitely is trust me I know from personal experience.

Lisakay

over 2 years ago

Let me move on
I am waiting for the judge to sign my divorce papers meanwhile my x won't stop stalking me I wish he would just go away he didn't have any trouble cheating on me so why can't he let me move on

nextphase

over 2 years ago

The Crazy Court System and Will I Survive It?
I am going into the 11th month since I left my emotionally abusive husband. We finally saw a Master (2 below a judge here in PA) and basically got nothing done. This man and his kids are living in my house, that I bought and I am renting a home. How did this happen? I put down 95K and then over... Continue reading

bellemom

over 2 years ago

How to cut off communication from abusive husband

Letting go

monty02

over 2 years ago

moving on
my husband of 8 months just up and left me one evening and didn't come back. but now that we are divorced he keeps driving me crazy txting me.. how do I move on?

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Surviving Your Divorce when the Courts are New to Emotional Abuse! (by: Dr. Anne Brown RNCS)
Prepare to Fight When one person only wants to control and sabotage during the divorce, mediation is usually not an option and a waste of money. I have seen victims of emotional abuse in their marriage be victims of mediation because they are the only person bringing adult behavior to the... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Preparing for Divorce in the Face of Emotional Abuse! (by: Dr. Anne Brown RNCS)
The History For years women and children have been considered to be property of men. There were laws enabling men to punish their wives physically. By the 1920’s all states had made “wife beating” illegal, however it has only been since the 1970’s the courts have treated it as a serious crime... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Spotlight: Inspiration from Marina Sbrochi as She Moves on After Abuse and Divorce
DivorceForce has been lucky to have Marina Sbrochi as a contributing writer since we started. We learned about Marina’s commitment to doing right by children in the face of divorce and had to share her perspective with the DivorceForce audience. Marina recently went back to school and her story... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Against the Odds (by: Trease Hinton)
I received a call from my academic advisor today congratulating me on the fact that I have an overall 4.0 GPA in my graduate studies. That, in and of itself, is great. It is, indeed, cause for celebration. I’m proud of myself. There’s more to the party, though. Once you’ve removed yourself from... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 2 years ago

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Spotlight: Claire Cappetta Offers Help for People in an Abusive Relationship
One of the most disturbing scenarios that often accompanies or is the cause of relationship break-ups is abuse. And at the same time, many stay in an abusive relationship and do not get out. 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men aged 18 and older have experienced severe physical violence by an intimate... Continue reading

goldenheart007

over 2 years ago

moving out
I filed for divorce. We are living in the same home we own, he wont leave or even talk to me. He is manipulating the kids financially and also trying to keep them away from me. He asked for full custody and he is playing both roles mom and dad. I want to move out but I need financial assistance. ... Continue reading

Lolo27

over 2 years ago

Divorce

I've been married for 5 years and it's been a roller coaster ever since then. He got up and left me and our 2 sons March 31st. I have been so depressed since then.... he has cheated on me so many times and then last summer he was sleeping with my neighbor. I should have stayed gone then but I hav... Continue reading

Laura31

almost 3 years ago

Mental abuse

Will you be able to meet someone

DivorceForce

almost 3 years ago

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Why She Kept Quiet (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
Good Lord! The level of foolishness I’ve heard about sexual assault over the past week — what it is, what it isn’t, when a claim’s valid, when it’s fluff, is unprecedented. So much of it makes my stomach crawl because I’ve heard everything from people questioning why a woman would wait years to... Continue reading

Babygirl

almost 3 years ago

Help
Need a divorce but don't no where to start. Can someone help me figure this out please.

JennK02

almost 3 years ago

Accepting Divorce is the best resolution

Divorce

Jennita

almost 3 years ago

New life
In zero

karimaratuech80

almost 3 years ago

Friendship

Trying to figure this out !

katmariedavis2016

almost 3 years ago

Am I the only stupid one out there?
Has anyone held on through various prison incarcerations, addiction, and emotional and verbal abuse? We been married for over 25 year's

katmariedavis2016

almost 3 years ago

Mentality overload!
Just so very emotionally tired!

Wilder1

almost 3 years ago

Img 0975

Philosophizing how I let a narcissistic psyschopath enter mine and my kids lives...
Never ever again

DivorceForce

almost 3 years ago

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That Mouth Of His (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
For 19 years, my ex-husband did and said horrible things to hurt me. The physical abuse in that marriage came in the form of the two rapes and those two incidents made me hate sex. I mean, I absolutely detested it. I felt the act of sexual intercourse was dirty. I felt dirty. In my book, I will... Continue reading

JoniTaylor

almost 3 years ago

I live in the country no neihboors. No car. No
I live on 4$$'$$40a week for groceries. I have no credit card checking account. He refused to pay my medical bills for the last 32 years
I have no credit. I am so unhappy with the way he left me here so I could have eye surgery and never called . I need to wait 6 months till I can divorce. He... Continue reading

fireball0830

almost 3 years ago

File to reclaim portion of homestead
What does it mean to refile a homestead claim? I divorced in September and he agreed for me to keep the house since we have a 9 and a 14 year old. We were married for 17years but only lived in this house for almost 2 years.My name is on the house and on the deed. He has his belongings in my hous... Continue reading

AugustWest

almost 3 years ago

Abused Husband

My wife and I have been together for 20 years. Much of that time was good though there were periodic outbursts of anger and drama by my wife. It didn't really bother me then. Then my work schedule changed to where I was home less and my drinking became heavier. I honestly don't know how bad it wa... Continue reading

Natalya

almost 3 years ago

Will it ever change

How do I know i am ready to file for divorce from an addict

DivorceForce

almost 3 years ago

Cc 022217 finding the inner power and strength to leave an abusive relationship e1487872627782

Finding the Inner Power and Strength to Leave an Abusive Relationship (by: Claire Cappetta)
People often wonder what it takes to leave an abusive relationship. They wonder if they have the strength and courage to leave. Most of us do but it doesn’t happen overnight. We watch movies where the abused stands up to the abuser one night, saying “That’s it! I’m leaving!” picks up their... Continue reading

Radioguy

almost 3 years ago

Feeling horrible
Going through a rough night tonight and the past few months. I go early ha e given my marriage my all then last 7 years. I have been honest and most loving towards my kids. They are everything to me. My wife has not been happy because we have not been financially stable for a while now. It is a ... Continue reading

Daisygirl

almost 3 years ago

Ready to leave abusive husband
Been with my abusive husband for over 25 years. We have 2 children, ages 13 and 10. Youngest is acting out in school and said she wants to kill herself. That was my biggest wake up call. I didn't realize just how much our horrible marriage did affect the kids. I've consulted 4 lawyers now, all te... Continue reading

Whiteladywolf

almost 3 years ago

Survivor, Not victim anymore
I am brand new to the site. My divorce became final in December after 16 years of marriage and 17 years together. I'm also new to meeting/taking to people through social media. Looking for advice, friends and first baby steps after years of abuse.

StrongClaire

almost 3 years ago

Staying strong and not giving up
I have been staying strong and not giving up.Estranged husband did verbally and physically abuse me and we are in the middle of a divorce.He did put me throught a lot of pain and I was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder last month from his abuse.I am doing better and on the medication ... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 3 years ago

Cc 012617 how to love again after abuse e1486064874443

How To Love Again After Abuse (by: Claire Cappetta)
It can feel very scary after you have left an abusive relationship, to think about finding someone to love again, or indeed trusting someone to love. Many times in an abusive relationship, we have been told so many lies about ourselves, we wonder what is real and what are the lies. Questions spin... Continue reading

lisacat1961

almost 3 years ago

divorce process
How to get the lawyers to stop delaying and ordering one continuance after another.

Rhondaroo

almost 3 years ago

Ex died
My alcoholic ex husband was found deceased in his home on Christmas Day - he had been deceased from 7 to 14 days...now his best friends wife has a handwritten will leaving everything to her. Of course! Which hurts out grown children even further... just venting

MsJones

about 3 years ago

Scared
I've been having some very realistic dreams lately. That have started since the divorce papers arrived almost a couple of weeks ago. I have been physically beaten up and verbally and emotionally for so long that I still live in fear. My dreams scare me more. When I'm home every noise I hear I thi... Continue reading

prtybrwneys

about 3 years ago

Stuck
So I separated in July 2014. He was somewhat around the first year but very distant. Then he went over the road driving for a year and a half. Didn't really see or him from him. I filed for divorce in April 2016. He didn't respond. We went to court in November and did court counseling. Now we ar... Continue reading

Free2beme2017

about 3 years ago

Staying separated and strong!!
After filing several times and to return and repeat again ... I need a strategy to keep away from his financial abuse games that keep me coming back to him.

Buddygirl

about 3 years ago

Not sure what to do
My husband has filed for divorce I got a restricted certified letter I don't want the divorce do I have to sign and pi k it up

camerasweets

about 3 years ago

drinking, drugs, anger... where do you draw the line? when do you know it's over?

I'm still in the beginning stages of all this... so I still go into periods of denial lol. Posting and actually expressing it for the world to see makes it so much more real. I guess I just keep thinking maybe this is all just one big sick joke, if you know what I mean. Like a nightmare I just ca... Continue reading

Ljparker

about 3 years ago

No credit
We are in yet another recess of our divorce trial. Can't get any credit for marital property or contributions towards estate.

pstegeman59

about 3 years ago

I KNOW IT GETS BETTER.......
pstegeman59
I had to go through my storage shed that I have & lo & behold I come across birthday cards, anniversary cards, Holiday cards, etc from my husband of 25 years. It was so heart breaking. I struggle each & every day to try to be strong on this divorce. Our communication i... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 3 years ago

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9 Steps to Stay Safe if Your Ex is Stalking and Harassing You (by: Claire Cappetta)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! It is always a tough decision to leave an abuser. It is always the most difficult step to make when we have been in such a controlling relationship. We are scared, we struggle to make sense of what is true and what is not, especially... Continue reading

pstegeman59

about 3 years ago

Surprise - Merry Christmas!
Well I finally get to see legal aid lawyer on 01.13.17. Too far from now for me. I asked my husband for copies (again) of the taxes that were filed jointly for financial paper work; but informed me I had to contact his lawyer. I did not even know he retained one. He informed me she sent me a lett... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 3 years ago

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The Volunteer Victim (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! So many times, I've seen people, not just women, walk back into bad situations, eyes wide open. He or she is very much aware that things aren't going to work out for their good, yet they head right back into the thing that destroyed... Continue reading

69skillit69

about 3 years ago

screwed by judge
How can My wife get a default divorce while I'm incarcerated in a mental institution being held as noncompetant to stand trial. The judge put me there and should have requested some one to appear on my behalf and didn't do it. I need a real attorney that works with the disabled.

katie953

about 3 years ago

seperation from a narcissist
I am seperated from my husband now this time for about 8 weeks. (Prior to that we were seperated for 6 months and then back together for 3 months). Im pretty certain from my research on narcissism and from my counselor that we are in the stage of the relationship where i no longer serve a purpose... Continue reading

pstegeman59

about 3 years ago

Another Day
Well trying to find a real low income divorce lawyer is NOT easy. Waiting for Legal Aid is a long process. In the meantime, I am so afraid to ask my husband of 25years for any money because he was told to stop giving me money So here I am still homeless, still disabled, still waiting for some res... Continue reading

Jillbug

about 3 years ago

Perfect to obsessed
My husband & I have been married 16yrs & have been to Hell & back several times. Our marriage was as perfect as a a relationship could be the 1st 9yrs. In our early 20's we built our on home while we both worked full time it took 2 yrs since we did it ourselves with only my fathers he... Continue reading

DivorceForce

about 3 years ago

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5 Tips for Divorcing a Passive Aggressive Ex (by: Laura Lifshitz)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! The games and power plays with a passive- aggressive ex are absolutely maddening, so if you find yourself constantly thinking, "What now?," you probably have a passive-aggressive ex. If you feel like you are dealing with a constant... Continue reading

Gracie

about 3 years ago

If he didnt want this relayio
Why

lisacat1961

about 3 years ago

default
What happens if your husband gets sent a summons and he doesn't respond in the 30 days with my lawyer about making a settlement will my divorce be granted right away by default.

lrw1947

over 3 years ago

harassment
I have had problems with my husband driving around my place of work ,he and his female friend driving around the work property , I work at retail store in maintenance, he was spotted in the store about an hour afterwards my fellow maintenance worker were called to the men's room, there was a mess... Continue reading

lrw1947

over 3 years ago

being harassed in text meassaged
Soon to be ex harassment

lrw1947

over 3 years ago

sposual abuse harrassment
Abusive marriage

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Is Your Spouse a Psychopath? Dos and Don’ts When Divorcing (by: Lisa Brick)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! There are numerous reasons a relationship unravels. The majority of them are due to a growing incompatibility of values and lifestyle choices. In some cases the reason is considerably deeper and darker. While these reasons are the... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Emotional Abuse: Would You Know It If You Saw It? (by: Dr. Kristin Davin)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! Emotional abuse. It's insidious how it creeps into your life. Moment by moment, day by day, week by week, the abuser chips away at your self-esteem and self-worth. I have yet to find a person who never feels they are doing or did... Continue reading

Sunshine926

over 3 years ago

Starting over.

Where do I go from here?

IG0tSUNshine

over 3 years ago

In need of guidance...
So here is the situation.
I was in a toxic relationship with someone for 13 years. I initiated the divorce and it was finalized over a year ago. While we were going through the divorce we still were living together. During the time before filing the divorce I was taking classes on line. His way... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Abusive Ex? Addict Ex? Criminal? Unstable? Here is How to Tell the Kids! (by: Marina Sbrochi)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! Is your ex violent? Verbally abusive? Drug or alcohol problems? Unstable? Criminal? You can't change the facts and I'm not suggesting hiding the facts or ignoring the facts at all. What I am suggesting to you is rephrasing the facts.... Continue reading

lostnconfused

over 3 years ago

controlling soon to be ex
My husband is controlling and manipulative. We've split for the second time. This is what he says he wants in fact he has a girlfriend staying in our home. He has even brought her in with our soon to be 9 year old son. He has done everything possible to make me look crazy but in fact everything I... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Getting out of an Alcoholic Marriage
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! Whether you stay in an alcoholic relationship out of love, fear, the kids or money, there comes a moment when you reach the end of the road. You have repeatedly believed his promises of turning a new leaf, only to be awakened in the... Continue reading

Confusedwishywashy

over 3 years ago

Lost confused

I am on the verge of getting divorced we are seperated living at different locations we have 2 very very beautiful children my daughter who is 7 she is daddies princess and my son who is will soon be 5 yrs old come OCT. last year we were finically stressed. I was working part time as and still is... Continue reading

tferg1951

over 3 years ago

abusive marriage
how to move forward after being in a very abusive marriage

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Abuse - When You Say Nothing At All (by: Chris Armstrong)
The smile on your face lets me know that you need me There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall You say it best when you say nothing at all Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! These are the... Continue reading

Momof4

over 3 years ago

Confused!!! Been waiting for 3 years.

Hard place to be. I had an affair with my boss (also married). I have been married 20+ years. I confessed, asked for forgiveness, totally changed everything about my life; Left my job and accepted a job in another city 30 minutes away. I text my husband every time I leave, arrive, etc. e... Continue reading

pennyhollick

over 3 years ago

How to Leave Abusive Marriage before it's too late!
Free Webinar this Friday on Housing from the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
go to http://bit.ly/2bhYjf8 for this webinar. NCADV http://www.ncadv.org/

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Husband Abused by Wife – In His Words
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! Domestic violence is pervasive. "On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men." ( Source ) Often,... Continue reading

secret04161975

over 3 years ago

Feel like I'm going crazy

I want a divorce from my husband of 13 years. He tried to punch me in the eye and he has choked me, shoved me to the ground and emotionally abused me for years. Financially I'm dependent on him though. I'm trying to save up for an attorney & he moved into the guest room but he won't stop tryi... Continue reading

brokenwings1961

over 3 years ago

I am trapped in a Horror Marriage

Married 34 years to a monster who 4 years ago was found out to have been living a double life through his work as a prostitute john and serial cheater, having had unprotected sex with scores of men and women. "Oh he's a sex addict and alcoholic, he couldn't help himself" ..I'm lying bleeding out ... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Divorce Information for Abused & Battered Women
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! Domestic abuse is the legal term for the heartbreaking violence that happens to women at the hands of their spouses. It often occurs behind locked doors, shattering the lives of some four million women every year and those of their... Continue reading

The Joy Coach

over 3 years ago

Does Your Partner Have a Right to Your Past and/or Memories?
Even when a marriage ends badly, most of us can look back and find at least one thing that we remember with a smile. When you are in a new relationship after divorce (including a marriage), does your new partner have a right to your past, your memories, or how you remember the now-ended relation... Continue reading

DivorceForce Moderator - Colin M.

over 3 years ago

I want to have an open and mature discussion about abuse. One topic that comes to mind is a topic that is often not discussed due to the sensitive nature. Abuse on a male spouse. This topic is often shrugged off and not taken serious but in reality it does happen. So lets take a moment and reflect and really think about the question at hand. How often do you think women are verbally and physically aggressive to their male counterparts?

Article 2669408 128c7b98000005dc 511 1024x615 large

How often do you think women are verbally and physically aggressive to their spouses?
Psychologists from the University of Cumbria found women were ‘significantly’ more likely to be verbally and physically aggressive to men than vice versa.

Jacardomy

over 3 years ago

Order of protection
I'm in the process of getting divorced after many, many years of verbal, emotional and financial abuse. However, this past year, when the process of divorce began, it's been intolerable. He constantly yells obscenities at me, threatens me and basically tortures me on a daily bases. As soon as I ... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Not Her (by: Trease Shine Hinton)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! I cannot count the number of times I've heard, "Trease, I would never have thought you were going through that" when I disclose the fact that I was the victim of domestic abuse for the 19 years that I was married. People always say,... Continue reading

DivorceFriend

over 3 years ago

I Married My Stalker.......before the term stalker was even coined!
I was 22 years old when I married in 1984, was the thing to do right out of college and the only thing expected from my very conservative Italian family. As first generation daughter, I already defied my parents by going college and wanting my career and independent life. Note, I paid for my un... Continue reading

rheadley2001

over 3 years ago

Thought I knew my spouse

Just got my summons today stating my fault due to cruelty/excessively vicious conduct towards my soon to be ex and my children. I expected this based on how she left but to see it on legal paper is too much.

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Stuck in an Arranged Marriage – When Divorce is the Only Answer
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Divorce is often hard to comprehend. How did things go the way they went? We often hear people ask, "Was I living a lie?" People change. Situations change. We would like to think that there was sincere loving relationship that provoked a marriage in... Continue reading

DivorceForce

over 3 years ago

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Walking Away From An Abusive Marriage (by: Dr. Kristin Davin)
Join the Conversation on DivorceForce Today! Working with victims of abuse has reinforced how insidious it is. How it sneaks up on you. I recognize it all too well. The put downs, the verbal aggression are ever so slight and nuanced in a way, that at first glance, don't appear to be... Continue reading

blindsided

over 3 years ago

I feel so lost need help
My husband of 12 years has left yesterday and told me he is no longer in love with me. I'm blindsided by this we have 2 young children. We were the picture perfect couple. I think he lost his mind. I'm
So not ok could use some advice

naelers

over 3 years ago

Looking for some Understanding
I am going through a personal nightmare and just need someone who knows what it's like and won't judge.

IG0tSUNshine

almost 4 years ago

Having trouble really moving on...
In advance, apologies for the long post.

BACKGROUND

After ending a marriage of over ten years to an all around abusive narcissist, he expects us to be friends. Now his definition of this is much different than you are probably thinking. It is actually more along the lines of casual sexual... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 4 years ago

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Dealing with a Verbally Abusive EX? HELP is Here! (by: Marina Sbrochi)
I want to preface -- if you think that your situation can become violent or has potential to become violent -- please contact authorities. Do not attempt to handle yourself. Never put a child in a situation that they will be hurt or in harms way. The advice below is for verbal abuse only.Verbal... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 4 years ago

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Steps in Leaving an Emotionally Abusive Marriage
Abuse is still abuse when it involves words rather than physical violence. The U.S. Office on Women's Health categorizes emotional abuse as attempts to control someone through fear or isolation, and says that it can lead to physical abuse. If your marriage has gone down this path, you can take... Continue reading

Nikkipoo

almost 4 years ago

Broken beyond repair
I've been mentally and verbally abused so much that my courage after finally leaving my abuser of 18 years is gone. Moved from my home to a new city and state, no help available. I'm beyond depressed and discouraged. My ex had total control. He told me that I would never make it on my own. I'm st... Continue reading

Nikkipoo

almost 4 years ago

I am completely broken down.

I have been married to a abusive man for 18 years. He was verbally abusive, controlling. manipulative. He always made me quit my jobs as soon as I made a friend. I finally got the courage to leave, and I can't find employment because of the gaps in my resume. plus I'm extremely depressed. Any hel... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 4 years ago

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Marriage Counseling for Verbally Abusive Relationships
Verbal abuse is emotional finger pointing, making disparaging remarks about who a person is, what they are, and what they value. When verbal abuse occurs within a marriage, the marriage suffers, and the abused individual sustains psychological damage that can be challenging to overcome, says... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 4 years ago

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Domestic Violence Support Group Activities
Family violence is isolating. The hurt, shame and fear victims feel can be barriers to seeking help. Yet, it is networks and communities that best support healing and recovery, validating victims' experiences and honoring their strengths. Many types of therapeutic group projects are available to... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 4 years ago

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How to Get Help in an Emotionally Abusive Marriage
If you often feel as if you are "walking on eggshells" to keep your spouse happy or to prevent your spouse from becoming angry with you, you are suffering emotional abuse. Daily life in such a relationship can cause you to identify yourself as a victim. The help you get when you are in an... Continue reading

BeenZ884

about 4 years ago

Constant yelling, now out of the house
My wife is always yelling. I realize she is under pressure from work and her parents, but for years (been out of the house 4 months) she would yell at me pretty much daily. She would say pretty harsh things, and after a while it really started to effect me. My therapist said it was text book v... Continue reading

InProcessnNY

over 4 years ago

Wrongfully accused!
Like a few others I know, my wife filed false police reports and now I've been kicked out of my house since she obtained a restraining order. I feel like they hand these out without the proper investigation. The judges don't want to take any responsibility should a real abusive situation arise,... Continue reading

DivorceForce

almost 4 years ago

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What to Do if a Spouse Violates a Divorce Restraining Order
Restraining orders don't always have to do with instances of domestic violence. In the context of divorce, a restraining order commonly freezes assets so they can't be dissipated or disappear before the court decides what will become of them. In some states, these orders are put in place... Continue reading

theWizard

over 4 years ago

quid pro quo
below is a typical day with the soon to be ex-wife......guess she forgot that she spent $1000's on Uber when I was paying for it!

Begin forwarded message:



From: Uber Receipts <[email protected]>

Date: Sep... Continue reading

LP300

over 4 years ago

Sociopathic Ex-Wife
I need to know if there are professional intermediaries out there that I can use as a buffer to deal with my ex-wife. She is a sociopath and dealing with her is truly bad for my health. I cannot separate my anger and frustration and not dealing directly with her is the only way for me. She is ... Continue reading

EP44NYC

over 4 years ago

Constant yelling!!
My wife is ALWAYS yelling at me, especially in front of her parents and her friends. I never thought I'd say this...but I'm being abused. I tried to talk to her about it, obviously she yelled at me. Any ideas here?
ROTATE
CANCEL
SAVE
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